The Myatery of Daughters in Chitral: by Suhail Ahmad
By Suhail Ahmad
Daughters, as the Quran emphatically endorse, are the blessings of Divinity. Chitralies, as being deeply and loosely connected with Islam simultaneously, treat their female children in a quite mysterious way. From cradle to grave, females are very likely to be a property of an 'Influential Figure,'_ prior to marriage, of father and brother (s,) and of husband after tiding the knot.
There are plethora of examples where these females are subjugated. Lets start from the most common one: Following the primitive and obsolete school of thought, a girl should serve her brother(s,) father and relatives to be called an 'obedient daughter.' She can hardly get basic education to maintain the 'honor' of her family even a vast majority of females exhale their last breath without seeing the aura of a teacher. Nevertheless, the matter gets worsened when it comes to marriage.
Marriage, in its essence, is a contract between two souls rather than bodies to entertain the new life with unconditionally, fervor and jubility. But factually, in our society, its a mere tall claim, farthest from practicality. Initially, the 'Guardian Angels' are the ones to select a husband for her, merely asking her, and strolling on her consent. This opted husband can be a Pashto speaker 'aged man' with gyre alike mustaches, suffering the language and culture barrier and, above all, claiming to be a 'MAN OF GREAT FORTUNE.' However, the patrons of the girl would finalize the 'deal,' rather than the contract, and would let the 'situational bridegroom' to takeaway his 'wife.' These Guardian Angels, either the father or the brothers, brutally negate the norms, traditions and culture of Chitral, and consequently let the life of Our Daughter be plunged into the trauma of language barrier, cultural difference, and push her into the ditch of misogyny, family animosity and into a bloodshed of honor killing. The scenario is as vivid as a daylight. To be very straightforward, the marriage is okayed just because 'he' is A MAN OF GREAT FORTUNE; we are a moneygrubbing, rapacious hypocrites the world can ever see.
However, the 'experienced bridegroom' (this is not for first he's getting married) would whisk away the Daughter of Chitral to tens of thousand miles away, leaving a pond of crocodile's tears behind. A daughter is buried prior to being dead in front of her mother's unconditionally drooping eyes.
Now, living far away from her hometown, this daughter of Chitral is a property of her Influential husband, chosen by her family, who can unjustly use her either as a child producing or money_making machine. This guy would frequently commond her to labour 24/7, or beat her to death to have an illicit relationship with other 'men.' The victimized daughter of Chitral, however, suffers even more psychological trauma when she recieves a reckless chide of being purchased from the husband.
Unable to bear the unbearable psychological, emotional and physical trauma, the eighteen years old daughter of Chitral tends to respond, initiating with her unconditional mother. The mother, unaware of the exact situation of her daughter, would nonchalantly advice her to have patience and pertinacity with her husband. Nevertheless, the situation gets worse, and the daughter of Chitral can meet three possible consequences: The family will kill her, she will commit suicide, or she'll get back to Chitral one way or the other. Upon reaching home, her white-bearded father won't believe her, scolding her of being 'Disobedient and Gullible.' Now, the her divorce from the bull_alike husband would be another mystery for the rest of her life_ she's got children, she would be scolded as being divorced and so on.
This is neither a feministic nor a controlling viewpoint, rather a subjective perspective that there are hundreds of thousands of Chitrali Daughters who are suffering their married life outside Chitral; and the irony is one can barely find any outsider being married in Chitral. How better it would be if we all firmly decided to do not let any outsider be the part of our family. We don't know their language, they've got different culture and different mindset; there is no point to establish relationship with them. Its a high time to eradicate this curse from our society. Lets make it possible by neither relying on the govt nor on any private organization, rather via spreading awareness amongst the common men and by altering the primitive mindset.
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